It’s beginning to smell a lot like….Ass!

 
The holiday season is upon us, it is time for rushing around in crowded malls, going to Christmas parties and eating, lots and lots of eating. I have not been at the gym in a couple of weeks, and I am starting to feel the effects of that.  Yesterday I went to spin class and the first 5 minutes I was so happy to be exercising; it felt good to being doing something good for my body. The bike beside me was empty at first then the ass man cometh….
All of a sudden my feelings of euphoria were replaced with gagging reflexes. You see the man beside me reeked of ass.  I was fighting the urge to throw-up in my mouth. I tried to tap into my inner Zen master and zone out. Just when I thought I mastered the craft I realized I was just holding my breath, so in order not to pass out due to lack of oxygen I had to take a big breath and then I swallowed the smell of ass…GROSS! The next 40 minutes of class were pure hell; I left feeling nauseous and my mouth tasted of ass. 
Here’s the kicker this man is Married!! Yes someone loves that smell of ass! She must love the smell of ass because why else would he smell like that. Seriously, if you love someone I think you should tell them they STANK. Here I am struggling to get a decent date and ‘The Ass’ man has found someone to love him.
I went to work out to get back into the swing of things, and to feel good. I left feeling stomach sick and now I am totally depressed for there must seriously be something wrong with me, for I am still single and I don’t smell of ass!

Comments

  1. Maybe thats where all us single girls are going wrong?? We smell too nice!! Or maybe we are better off to be single than smelling that each day!!! Either way… you made me laugh!!!Maybe his wife wishes she was single….. so many maybes!!!

  2. Yes so many maybes!

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