The New Miracle Beer Diet

We’re Doomed!

This year Roxxxy the sex robot was introduced to the world at the AVN Adult Entertainment Expo in Las Vegas. Yes you’ve read that right, SEX ROBOT!!
Roxxxy is 5 feet, 7 inches tall, 120lbs, and “has a full C cup and is ready for action,” according to Mr. Hines, who was an artificial intelligence engineer at Bell Labs before starting True Companion.

What is this world coming to? Not only is it hard enough dating in the world of text messaging but we have to compete with a Life Size Sex Robot! Mr. Hines states “She’s a companion. She has a personality. She hears you. She listens to you. She speaks. She feels your touch. She goes to sleep. We are trying to replicate a personality of a person.” Hmm trying to replicate the personality of a person but yet you call her Roxxxy the sex robot hence the triple x in her name. Face it dude, you were not getting laid and probably became allergic to the plastic dolls, which prompted you to use your education to create a mate for yourself.
Here’s an idea for ya, now call me crazy but why not meet a real woman. You know the flesh and blood kind that has a brain, personality and breaths. However if you do meet a real women, word of advice do not introduce her to Roxxxy unless of course Roxxxy can cook, clean, and do laundry.
Cheers!

Really?

You know when you read something and you shake your head at the sheer stupidity of someone. Well I did that today upon reading an article in the Toronto Star about a lady suing her cell phone company because her marriage ended. She claimed that the company violated her privacy because her personal cell phone bill was lumped in with her then husbands and he noticed hour long conversations with someone on the detailed account. When he phoned the number the “other man” confirmed the affair and her husband left her. There are other details such as her maiden name was on the account, her affair was only short lived at that point, she is embarrassed by what happened and couldn’t work etc….

Canada is not like the USA when it comes to legal cases and honestly if I read this in a US newspaper I wouldn’t think twice about it, but reading it in a Canadian newspaper I feel this lady has insulted me personally. Why, you may ask? Well because in the USA people sue, that is how things are resolved, in Canada we don’t, it’s like we know that we fu**ed up and we’re just hoping nobody else took notice .
I do agree that the cell phone company made a mistake, but really, didn’t you think you made a bigger mistake by cheating on your husband? If you don’t then you have bigger issues.

One of my pet peeves is people who don’t take responsibility for their actions. Whether right or wrong, don’t deny your part in things. I have to shake my head at this, and just say “Really” (as sarcastically as possible).

Queen B

Things that make you say WTF..

Recently I was at Shoppers drug Mart looking for the new Schick Quarto Trim Style Razor (yes I am excited about this product, it’s a razor and bush trimmer) but I do not think it is here in Canada just yet. However I did see this product by Venus, it is a vibrating razor and comes with its own AAA battery. I did think about purchasing it so that I can do a product review but I could not see the purpose of it. Why do we need a razor to vibrate?
Obviously it was man that thought of this genius idea because no women would want a vibrating razor near her bits and pieces. Would a man let a vibrating razor blade near his balls? NOT! According to this ad campaign the vibrating razor sends vibrations to the skin which raises the hair for a closer shave. Isn’t that what a loofah sponge is for? While I’m on the topic of products that don’t make sense can someone please tell me why you would want to wear a G-String Panty liner?

I mean the whole purpose of the g-string is to have no panty lines, but also to be playful and sexy. How can you feel sexy with this stuck to your g-string and is there really enough material to hold it in place. All that can come of this is you will end up have a piece of sticky absorbent cotton stuck between you ass cheeks. How’s that for feeling fun and flirty!

Cheers!

How to Speak "Womeneese"

This is for all the guys out there, I know we can be hard on you sometimes but it’s not your fault you just lack the proper interpretation skills..This should help you out a bit.

Dictionary for Personal Ads

40-ish – 49
Adventurous – Slept with everyone
Athletic – No tits
Average Looking – Ugly
Beautiful – Pathological liar
Contagious Smile – Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure – On medication
Feminist – Fat
Free Spirit – Junkie
Friendship first – Formerly ‘friendly’ person
Fun – Annoying
New Age – Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded – Desperate
Outgoing – Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate – Sloppy drunk
Professional – Bitch
Voluptuous – Very Fat
Large Frame – Hugely Fat
Wants soul mate – Stalker

Wonmen’s English

1) Yes = No
2) No = Yes
3) Maybe = No
4) We need = I want
5) I’m Sorry = you’ll be sorry
6) We nee to talk = you’re in trouble
7) Sure,go ahead = you better not
8) Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9) I’m not upset = of course I’m upset, you Jackass!
10) You’re very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about

For the ladies guy’s are very simple but just in case you need to be reminded here some help interpreting what’s on a man’s mind…

Man’s English

1)I’m hungry = I’m Hungry
2)I’m sleepy = I’m sleepy
3)I’m tired = I’m tired
4)Nice dress = nice cleavage
5)I love you = let’s have sex
6)I’m bored = Do you want to have sex?
7) May I have this dance? = I’d like to have sex with you
8)Can I call you sometime?= I’d like to have sex with you
9)Do you want to go to a movie = I’d like to have sex with you
10)Can i take you to dinner = I’d like to have sex with you
11) Those shoes don’t go with that outfit = I’m gay

Cheers!
Single Gal

Merry Christmas Ladies!!!

George asked me to pass this on

Yes I am on a first name basis with George. He had asked me to post this message for the the Single Gals out there…Thanks George!

The Uro Club….A Discrete Sanitary Solution???

Recently I saw this ad:

Boys, boys, boys do you really need this ridiculous device. Isn’t one of the joys of having a penis is you ability to pee anywhere? Why would you go through all the hassle of sticking your penis in this tube to hide the fact that your are peeing. Plus how are going to explain the apron?

This product should come with a warning, “Do not use when drunk because chances are this is the only time that you will try this”. You know you’re gonna miss the hole and end up pissing all over yourself. So genius just pee like a man, head to a bush, turn away from the course and let her rip.

Cheers!
Single Gal

The Big Boy??????

“Are you man enough?” this is the slogan for The Big Boy bulge enhancer. I’m thinking they should change it to “So you’re not man enough?” Yes ladies there is such a thing as the bulge enhancer. They advertise this as the man’s answer to the padded bra. Now boys, yes some of us gals wear padded bras, but it is usually the last thing to come off. Once it does we shove “The Girls” in your face. This confuses you and you forget that we started off as a C cup rather than a B. If you ever do use ‘The Big Boy’, remember that once the pants come off your secret is revealed. You do not have the same luxury of just shoving it in our faces because we are not that easily confused. Also, walking around with a perma bulge is not that attractive to us gals…it is so ‘82. Chances are we will just write you off as a perv. So if you are thinking of purchasing ‘The Big Boy’ save your money and use a pair of socks.

Cheers!
Single Gal

Trimming the bush makes the tree look taller…

This ingenious slogan comes to you from Gillette. They have made a YouTube series on “manscaping”. We are all for manscaping here at Single Gals. Yes it is very manly to have hair on your chest; however when it comes to hairy backs we draw the line. Boys please do not get offended because women everyday are either shaving their bits and pieces, applying makeup, wearing heels all for the sake of getting your attention. The least you can do is a little maintenance. This first video is on how to shave your groin area. It looks to me that Gillette thinks that you need to shave it all off, actually we prefer that you didn’t. A trim will do just fine because if we wanted to go to Bush Gardens we’d visit the park.

This second video is on how to shave your back. This is very good advice. If it looks as though you’re wearing a wool sweater all year round then it is time to shave. This video illustrates that you will need help so don’t be shy to ask your girlfriend, wife or fling, believe me they will be more than happy to assist.

 

Good job stud! Now that you are done with the grooming go out there and impress the ladies with your tall tree!!!

Cheers!
Single Gal

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