How to survive the online dating world

I grew up in the 90’s dating era, it was a time when you met a boy, he took your number and YES he called you. Usually, it ended up being a relationship. Imagine that meeting and investing time to get to know each other, how primitive.

Now I must contend with online dating, I have never been a fan but how does one find a life partner when you can’t go to events or social gatherings. I conceded defeat and joined Bumble, I like the concept that the woman has control, and that users can’t see when you are online.  I have been on the app for two months, had many conversations that go nowhere. I make 3 attempts to engage in conversation but it’s usually one-word answers with no real follow up.  

If you can breakthrough and have a conversation and it moves to talking outside the app (Second Base in the online dating world) it can go one of three ways.

  1. After the first hey this Blah Blah Blah text he will ask for more pics, usually Tit Pics
  2. You keep talking and set up at date. Then they will just disappear off the face of the earth until one day the Aliens send them back and they WILL reach out to you a week or two later with “Hey how’s it going?”
  3. You make it to a date only to find out that the pics were from 10 years ago when he was 60lbs lighter and had hair. Post current pictures please that way if someone swipes right, they are interested in the person they see now not 10 years ago.  I know it’s hard to put yourself out there and as you get older you want to hang on to those glory days. But just do it because your person is out there, and they will eventually find you.  Yes, even after all this I am hopeful that my person will find me.

So how do you survive online dating?

  1. Focus on yourself, start a self-care routine. I’ve bought a spin bike and have been working out daily. I am lucky enough to have medical plan that allows me to use it for alternative health practices. I have gone to the naturopath, got a couple of massages, next will be acupuncture. All things the strengthen my wellbeing. The better your feel about yourself the less you care when thing go nowhere online.
  2. Delete your account! If you find that you are getting jaded or depressed by it all it’s time to delete your account. I do believe we attract what we are putting out. If we are expecting to meet mister Tit Pic we will meet him just to confirm our belief that they are all like that.
  3. Maybe you have meet someone with strong potential and want thing to move along but you must deal with them and all their options or what they perceive are options. When the reality is the pool is not that big. You must come to terms that this may drag on and you may never meet, it’s up to you to decide how long you are willing to stick it out.  If you do this keep your options open as well.

Good luck out there, I know you can find what you are looking for just don’t lose yourself in the process. When that person comes along hopefully it will just flow and everything will easily fall into place. Be strong, take care of yourself and remember you are not alone. The struggle is real, but we need to believe that the universe has our back and will send that perfect person our way when the time is right.

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